Every once in a while...

...it's important to embrace one's feminine side with the aid of a feather boa.

Powerpointless

I think the time has come for a bit of a rant! Those of you who know me will know that I'm not Microsoft's biggest fan, but if there's one piece of software that has been consistently misused to the point where it threatens to kill off civilization as we know it, it's Powerpoint. The Microsoft website promises that with Powerpoint you can 'create dynamic and impactful presentations' . Impactful?!! Good grief! It should have a more realistic statement along the lines of 'With Powerpoint you can muddle through an appalling presentation that leaves audiences fantasising about extracting their own teeth with pliers.'

According to a government website (or my own experience - I forget which), in 98% of presentations involving Powerpoint, it is used really badly. So, without further ado, here are my top six Powerpoint gripes:

(1) When you turn up to a presentation only to find you have to watch someone fiddling about with cables and sockets for half an hour. (Always keep a puzzle book tucked away in your notes for just such emergencies.)
(2) When people stand in the way of the projector and don't realise that they've got last year's sales figures all over their face.

(3) When people think it is somehow adding to their presentation to have every sentence uttered come up behind them with a bullet point attached.

(4) When people are heckled by their own Powerpoint because they've commandeered some incompetent buffoon to click the mouse for them.

(5) When people think that adding stupid clip art and sound effects makes their presentation more 'funky'.

(6) When people seem to forget that they're talking to an audience because they're obsessed with staring at the terminally dull slides on their laptop.

2 great podcasts

I have recently been enjoying Channel 4's excellent Thisisakinife podcast which gives a weekly roundup of the interesting, funny and surreal goings-on in Internetland. The podcast is available through iTunes and is a shortened version of the full show which can be downloaded from the Channel 4 website.

Great for geeks, the Practical Web Design magazine podcast (available through iTunes) is a technical podcast that actually makes sense! There is plenty of really useful information that is pitched at just the right level and delivered in an easy-going way. Highly recommended (unless you couldn't care less how to use Google maps, improve your web images, create podcasts, use cascading style sheets...)

Living alone

I live alone. Sometimes I like it but often I hate it. I'm trying to find ways to be more positive in my attitude in general, so I thought I'd list the things I like about living alone:
(1) I can drink orange juice straight from the carton without people knowing I'm a slob.
(2) I can talk to my hamster without it ruining my 'no cute animals' reputation.
(3) I don't have to feel guilty if I don't do the washing up straight away.
(4) I can watch LOTS of snooker on British Eurosport.
(5) I can pray out loud any time of the day or night.
(6) I can strum away at the only four chords I know on the guitar and it doesn't matter that it sounds rubbish.
(7) I can leave an unfinished jigsaw on the table for months without it being disturbed.
(8) I know EXACTLY where everything is.
(9) I can get home late and not be disturbing anyone.
(10) I can wander around naked (until I realise that I live in a ground floor flat with a bus stop outside the window).